Request or Demand?

In NVC, a true request leaves the other free to say no. Learn to spot the difference between requests and demands.

Tips to Remember

If they said no, would you accept it gracefully? If you'd be upset or punishing, it was a demand.

True requests are often phrased as questions: "Would you be willing to...?" "Could you...?"

"At least", "If you loved me", "You should", "After all I do" signal demands.

In NVC, the other's "no" is valuable information about their needs, not a rejection of you.

Master the complete OSBD process step by step

Next step

Practice listening with presence: distinguish empathy, advice, sympathy, and reassurance.